Why you should get married in Maine

Thanks to Chelsea, from the awesome wedding blog Tidewater and Tulle, for interviewing me and asking me all about what make Maine such a great place to get married. I met Chelsea on social media because we're both crazy cat ladies and both love weddings. When she came to Maine on a press tour I made sure to pop down to the beautiful Inn by the Sea to finally meet her in person. We walked down to sweet Crescent Beach just down the boardwalk from the Inn to do this impromptu interview.

I wish I could do every interview barefoot on a beach! 

guest blog: how i met my husband

POSING WITH MY HUSBAND BEFORE HE WAS MY HUSBAND

by Beth Fitzgerald
Editor, The Maine Wedding Company

Brian and I worked for the East Valley Tribune in Arizona as newspaper photojournalist during the late 90's. We barely knew each other when a mutual friend and fellow photographer, Samantha, asked us to pose for a freelance job she was working on for a national photography magazine. Her assignment: Taking natural couples portraits. 

The three of us went to a nearby playground to take the pictures. Samantha set us up in various positions from snuggly to silly. It was super awkward at first but Sam worked her magic — wearing us down shot after shot. Twisting arms, moving hands. Changing our embrace until nothing was left but sweet vulnerability. 


What can you do? You're just wrapped up with a complete stranger! You're forced to let walls down. You're forced to laugh and smile. Your forced to gaze and breathe and connect in way that I can only explain as human.

Then it was over. Got the shots. Great. Everyone went off to other things — separately.

Now, I can remember my face feeling red and how bright it was that day. I remember Brian's white shirt. I remember thinking that the images were cute when Sam showed them to me just a few days later. She had done a nice job. But that's about it; nothing amazed me at the time.

It wasn't until Samantha brought out those same photographs out two years later that I really saw it.  It was amazing. Brian and I were seriously dating by then and  I saw it. I fit right under his arm perfectly. From my expression, I felt safe. I saw the look Brian that gives me when he thinks I am being adorable. I saw how I touch him in photos. I saw us— our connection. 

Whoa! How we connected with each other before, not knowing each other, was the same way we connected with each other now that we were together. It was a shock to see.

I wish I had those photographs now. I don't. Brian and I have been married over 10 years and have daughter together. What would I be able to see now? Our bodies and faces have changed, but our connection has not. 

frida kahlo inspired wedding shoot

Frida Kahlo Inspired Wedding Editorial Shoot from Ale Vidal on Vimeo.

 

you guys have to check out this styled wedding shoot by alejandra of imaginale design. i'm not usually a big fan of styled shoots, sometimes they just seem so forced and fake but i LOVE this one. the colors are incredible, the dress is stunning, the flowers, the hair piece...ah!! it's all gorgeous. alejandra said "The Frida shoot was such a special piece that I poured a lot of dreaming and planning into!" well, you can tell!

you can view the stills from the shoot on one of the most inspiring wedding blogs. sara burnett who runs burnett's boards has an eye for putting together gorgeous wedding boards. i'm sure you'll love them! 

top 10 pinterest wedding peeps

recently i've seen a bunch of wedding bloggers putting out their top 10 pinners to follow on pinterest for wedding inspiration. well, i LOVE pinterest and am on it daily, so i thought i'd join in the fun.

i tried choosing some unique pinners because you probably already know about all the usual ones (martha stewart weddings, 100 layer cake, style me pretty, etc.). below is my list of people or organizations you could follow to get awesome wedding inspiration. have fun!

 

1. F R I P P E R I 

 

2. Kinfolk Magazine - "a guide for small gatherings"

 

3. sara {burnett's boards} 

 

4. {this is glamorous}

 

5. gus & ruby letterpress

 

6. every last detail

 

7. grey likes

 

8. reverie magazine

 

9. the white dress by the shore

 

10. a sweet start

wedding trend: die-cut decor

die-cut elements are a big hit in weddings right now. from invitations to place cards to favors to jewelry. you can die cut into wood, metal, paper, hard plasti, leather. i love how die-cut items look like lace: delicate and sophisticated. what do you think of this trend? 

one of the brides from a wedding i performed owns a business called peppersprouts and she makes all sorts of cool "modern home decor and accessories" and many of them are die-cut. i love her stuff! she also has a great blog called upstate fancy, check it out!

 

 

actually i think this last one is a papercut which is different than die-cut, but it's so cool i wanted to share it anyway.

sock bun tutorial

 

when i got married i wanted a sock bun, except i didn't know that's what it was called. i love this kind of bun, especially for a wedding, and this tutorial makes it look pretty easy to do. plus, wendy, who is teaching the tutorial is so damn cute you'll just want to watch her!

below are a few photos from my wedding so you can see my sock bun!

photo by amy wilton photography

photo by amy wilton photography

photo by amy wilton photography

photo by amy wilton photography

tips for a successful marriage

i recently saw a post on the huffington post about successful marriages and what makes them that way. while i totally agree with the author of the story, it made me start thinking about my own marriage. i've only been married for six years, so maybe i don't have the authority to tell someone else what makes a successful marriage, but in those six years we've been through hell and back. so i'm going to share my tips for a successful marriage and you can do with them what you will. 

  1. "give in" - you don't have to do this one all the time, but there are tons of occasions where giving in rather than holding your ground on some ridiculous point is the better thing to do for the marriage. if it's really, really hard for your to give in, then use the phrase "you may be right." by allowing that your partner may be right you're acknowledging that there may be some truth to what he/she is saying while still maintaining some of your power. it's a gem!
  2. "admit it when you're wrong" - this sort of follows "give in" but it's a little different. use this phrase sparingly (so it retains its impact) and ONLY use it when you're really apologizing. DO NOT under any circumstances use it sarcastically. here goes: "you're right, i'm wrong, i'm sorry, and i love you." i'm telling you, this one works wonders!
  3. "use check-ins" - this is sort of like the huffington posts's suggestion of having a date night once a week. that sounds great on paper (screen?) but in reality finding the time for a romantic date night every week is not bloody likely. so instead, use the check-in. it takes only a few minutes and you can do it anywhere. stop, take a breath, look your mate in the eye, and honestly ask "how are you?" you must only do this if you really want to know the answer because sometimes the convo can get heavy. 
  4. "have an attitude of gratitude" - this is where i totally agree with the author of the blog post but i want to take it even further. rather than just acknowledging the big accomplishments (which you'd probably do anyway, right?) make it a personal challenge to notice any little thing your partner does. for example, if i notice that my husband has taken out the recycling, i thank him for it. or if i see that he's washed my to-go mug and boiled the water for the coffee, i thank him for it. i am honestly grateful for every little thing he does, and want to know the best part? he does this for me, too! it means we're always on the lookout for ways appreciate the other.  
  5. "do good" - do nice things for your mate. they don't have to be big, grand gestures, just little things. try to do one thing every day. i'd love to see some suggestions in the comments.
  6. "be alone" - everyone talks about this and it can be really hard to do, but you must find time to be alone. even if you're like me and you sincerely enjoying spending as much time with your husband as you can, you MUST have alone time. if you're also like me, you don't want to hurt your husband's feelings by saying "i just want to be alone right now" but work up the nerve, honey. it's SO important. 
  7. "have a hobby" - this sort of follows having alone time but the two may not necessarily go together. finding something you really enjoy and allowing yourself to be immersed in it now and again is so healthy for your marriage. i bet your partner fell in love with you because you were this wonderful, interesting, independent person who had passions and dreams and interests. well, my advice is: don't loose those when you get married. you may think "duh, of course i'm going to keep doing _____" but you'd be surprised how easily _____ can fall by the wayside. don't let it. 

so, there you have it. i must say that i'm not great at doing all of these things but i know that if/when i do them they really do strengthen my marriage. i'm SUPER lucky to be with a man who is also working on this same list, so i've got that going for me. i hope your partner feels the same way. best of luck on the journey of a lifetime!