surprise, this post is about me! this month my husband and i are celebrating seven years of marriage. before i answer the questions below, i want to tell you a little bit about how we met, cuz it's such an awesome story.
in 2005 i was vacationing at club med in cancun, mexico with my sister and her best friend. i was on "spring break" from graduate school and was there to have a relaxing week. six months before this i had broken it off with a guy i had dated for three months who was such an a**hole that i had finally decided i was done! i didn't need a stupid boyfriend, and i didn't even need to ever get married (although this is something i had wanted since i was a wee child). i had a great group of friends, i was getting my masters degree, i loved everything about my life, why did i need a stupid guy?! anyway, fast forward six months and i'm on the beach in mexico sipping bright green slushy drinks.
the first night there i met my sweetheart. i didn't know it at the time (actually i didn't even remember meeting him that first night, it wasn't until he introduced himself the second night that i got a good look at him - swoon!). that was march and by the following january we were married and living in canada!
there are few words that adequately describe the feeling of knowing that you've met your soulmate. to this day when i try to tell people what it felt like i roll my own eyes because it sounds so trite and cliche. i can tell you that he tucked a flower behind my ear while we stood on the beach in the moonlight and then we kissed for the first time. i can tell you that i cried, no sobbed, when he left cancun (which, you can imagine, was really awkward at the time). i can tell you that it was about two weeks later when we were professing our love for each other (over the phone - i was living in california and he was living in british columbia). it all just felt exactly right. and it still does!
we've had our share of difficulties, which maybe someday i'll share with you, but through all the crap it has never failed to feel exactly right. every day i wake up and am glad to have another day with him. every night i look him in the eyes before turning out the light. on the sea of life, he's my soulmatey!
how many years have you been married?
when and where did you get married?
nelson, brisith columbia, january 2006 and then again in walpole, maine in august 2006
what did you like most about your wedding?
the location! we got married on the back lawn of my parent’s home which is on a tidal river. it was the most stunning spot to get married.
what would you have done differently about your wedding?
i would have started the ceremony at least an hour earlier. our wedding started at 4:30 p.m. and it just wasn’t enough time. everything took way longer than we expected and we ended up only having a short time for dancing.
what changed after you got married?
i had this incredible sense of calm and contentment. i felt a peacefulness that i knew was possible but had never felt before.
what surprised you the most about being married?
that it really isn’t that hard. people say “marriage is hard work” and there’s some truth to that (especially if you have any kind of crisis in your relationship) but in general i found it very easy. everything sort of just worked out in terms of who would do what around the house and how decisions would be made. our core values are so similar that we don’t have many major conflicts of interest. i also have a very agreeable husband, which probably helps!
what do you like most about being married?
everything! honesly, i just love being married. you know how during the day if you find something interesting or funny and you think “oh i can’t wait to tell my husband/wife/boyfriend/girlfriend!” well that’s pretty much how i feel about everything in my life. i can’t wait to share it all with nick.
what advice do you have for engaged couples or newlyweds?
i saw a pin on pinterest the other day that said, “i want a marriage more beautiful than my wedding” and that about sums it up. have fun with the wedding but remember that the marriage is really the best part! also, remember to use this phrase “you’re right, i’m wrong, i’m sorry and i love you.” only use it when you really mean it and then it can be very helpful. so can “you might be right” that’s a really good one to remember and use often. one other thing, the passion and spark of hot steamy love you feel right now will change into something much more meaningful and lovely. in time it might feel like the passion is gone but it’s not it’s just morphing. be prepared for this so that you don’t mistakenly think you’ve “lost the spark.”
if you could change one thing about your marriage, what would it be?
i wish we were better at paying more attention to each other every day. we get so distracted by the stuff in our lives that we sometimes don’t check in to see how we’re really doing.
would you ever consider renewing your vows?
absolutely! we’re planning on it for the 10th anniversary!