I’ve been officiating weddings long enough to know the number one mistake couples make that makes their wedding stressful, upsetting, and not a lot of fun. You might think it has something to do with the budget or making sure there’s enough food, but from what I’ve seen it’s something less obvious and more insidious. Read on to find out the number one mistake couples make at their wedding.
The number one mistake couples make
If you want a relaxing, stress-free wedding, then take my advice:
Do not make any decisions on wedding day!
Said another way: make sure all possible decisions are made in advance of the wedding. If you’re working with a team of wedding professionals, this is going to be so much easier for you. But even if you’re working with a great team of vendors, try with all your might to avoid having to make any decisions on wedding day.
I include a wedding rehearsal in all my weddings. Why? Well, one reason is so that we can make any final decisions we need to the day before the wedding itself. You may be asking yourself, “What kinds of decisions is she talking about?” I’m talking about something as specific and potentially upsetting as where the parents and stepparents are going to sit.
I had a groom whose parents were divorced and did not get along at all. As an example, his parents were so uncomfortable with each other they couldn’t walk him down the aisle together. They definitely couldn’t sit next to each other during the ceremony. But because they were both remarried, the question came up: in what order would they be seated during the ceremony? Normally the mother of the groom sits in the chair on the aisle and the father of the groom sits in the second chair in from the aisle (on the groom’s side). But that wouldn’t work for this family.
Can you imagine the stress that would have arisen had we waited until wedding day to decide where they were going to sit? It could have been very upsetting and could have caused some hurt feelings as well as some family drama.
However, we determined the seating order in advance of the wedding (actually, we even decided in advance of the rehearsal), and so, on wedding day everyone knew exactly where they were going and there was zero issues.
This is just a small example, but hopefully it illustrates the point: do not wait until wedding day to make last minute decisions!
Can’t Avoid all Decisions
You’re probably saying, “That’s great, Maria, but we can’t anticipate every possible decision.” And, you’re right, which is why you should also be working with a professional wedding planner or day of wedding coordinator and a team of qualified wedding professionals. So, if a last-minute decision does have to be made, it can be made by someone other than YOU (the brides or grooms).
Let the professionals take on the stress of fixing problems, finding solutions and making decisions. That way you can stay in the moment, be present with your love, and just enjoy the day. No drama!
Sounds good, doesn’t it?